5 Ways to Start a Conversation with Your Teen About Vaping

Written by Ellie Lathrop, MSW, RSW.

Teen vaping is on the rise and with the serious health risks, finding a way to talk to your teen is an important task. As anyone who is a parent to a teenager would know, these kinds of conversations can be tricky.

It was really cold this morning, and as I was walking, my breath came out in white clouds of condensed water vapor. But the clouds of vapor we are seeing, or that are hidden from our sight, particularly with our youth are not of cold air. Teenagers have taken to vaping in a serious way in the last few years. Since e-cigarettes were legalized in May 2018, the rates of teen vaping have been increasing rapidly. As a parent and a therapist, this is chilling. We are learning more and more about the real health risks associated with vaping. Conversations with teenagers about vaping may be challenging, as I know from personal experience.

Nicotine addiction is only one of the concerns related to vaping. Dr. Theo Moraes, a respirologist at The Hospital for Sick Children was recently quoted in a CBC article:

“Nicotine is powerfully addictive … while someone starting cigarettes may cough, vaping doesn’t have the same “noxious feedback” for people to stop. You can deliver a fair chunk of nicotine in a pod, sometimes the equivalent of a pack or two packs of cigarettes and so for a young person you can get a fair amount of nicotine and quickly become addicted to it.”

(cbc.ca).

There are other serious health concerns that are associated with vaping, including;

• damage to the developing brain,

• unknown long-term health effects of inhaling propylene or vegetable glycol,

• increased risk of heart attack,

• and possible burns.

(heartandstroke.ca)

As a parent, how do you begin or continue a conversation with your teen about their vaping? Here are some things to keep in mind that can be helpful:

5 Helpful Ways to Come Alongside Your Teen in a Conversation About Vaping

Start with listening.

Know that teen vaping is likely not about a lack of knowledge about the risks. Our teens are generally smart and well informed. There is a lot of evidence that shows that we all make decisions in life that we know are not good for us. This can be compounded during adolescence, a time in life where there is increased risk taking, and a feeling of being invincible. It is helpful to ask, (instead of tell), your teen what they know about vaping.

If possible, show genuine curiosity, in a calm manner, about their use.

Try to understand what they like about it, and how they feel about vaping. This can open the door to understanding what might be the reason for their use. Your teen may tell you: “It is a way to connect to my friends.” or “It helps me cope with my anxiety or calm me down.” If you can begin to understand this, you are having a very different type of conversation with your teen about their vaping.

Ask if it is okay for you to share your concerns about their vaping.

Beginning with respect, and then describing that you are worried about them and want to know how to help them is a way to connect and offer support. We all want what is best for our kids and sometimes our underlying feelings of worry and concern can be expressed as frustration and anger. Approach conversations about vaping a time when you are both able to share your thoughts. Let your teen know that you care about them and are not angry with them about their use can go a long way to keeping the lines of communication open.

Be cautions of consequences.

You may decide as a parent that you want to set limits and consequences if you find out your teen is vaping. The possible risk of this approach is that their use becomes secretive. You can let teens know that you don’t agree with or approve of their vaping, while also letting them know that they can talk to you about this, and you will be there for them.

Keep talking about it.

Finally, remember that conversations about vaping are best when it is not just a single discussion, but an ongoing dialogue. Finding ways to check in with your teen about vaping or anything else in their life, is a process. It is important to put time and energy into your relationship with your teen, so that they will come to you when they need to talk.

As a parent of teens, it is hard take my own advice sometimes. I know that I make mistakes. However, I remind myself that repair is always possible.

If you are finding it challenging to connect with your teen, accessing counseling can be very helpful. Often this is a path back to establishing an open dialogue at home. If your teen needs support regarding worry, low mood or other mental health or substance use issues, therapy is an effective option for support.

Wishing you good conversations and a warm and happy holiday season.

Need help talking about vaping with your teen?

If you need help talking with your teen about difficult subjects, or are just looking for new strategies to help you connect, counselling can help.